Brilliant, but detrimentally choppy
Your many melodic themes contain feeling and remarkable depth, but I have to dock four points for your lack of transition and unity between your themes and different combinations of instrumentation and even rhythm and tempo. It is EXTREMELY disjointed and choppy, and from one theme to the next it feels like you have switched to a totally different song and feeling. When you switch too many times and don't use in-between themes to smooth the transition, you dilute the emotional staying power of all of them.
Please read this and respond if you think there's something I'm missing. I'd like to know your side of the story.